In this episode of Le Podcast on Emerging Leadership<\/em>, John Poelstra<\/strong> and I explore the book The Anatomy of Peace<\/em> by the Arbinger Institute and what it teaches about leadership, responsibility, and inner stance.<\/p>\n\n\n\n John first recommended The Anatomy of Peace<\/em> in our previous conversation on how (not) to provide feedback. I read it twice and fell in love with it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In Changing Your Team From The Inside<\/em>, I write that change starts with you<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Change starts with who you are.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Not with techniques. Not with intentions. With the way you relate to others, and to yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n One of the core ideas of the book is the distinction between:<\/p>\n\n\n\n When our heart is at war, we tend to see others as:<\/p>\n\n\n\n When our heart is at peace, we see others as people, as human beings with their own needs, struggles, and intentions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This inner stance profoundly shapes how we lead, collaborate, and respond to conflict.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We discuss the idea of being \u201cin the box\u201d: These boxes justify our behavior and keep us stuck. We also explore how this maps well with Christopher Avery\u2019s Responsibility Process<\/strong>, where responsibility increases as we move away from blame and justification.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The book reminds us that we always have a choice:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Another powerful idea we discuss is how our body gives us signals<\/strong> when our heart is at war. Tension, discomfort, and reactivity can become cues to pause and reflect.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We also touch on practices that support this inner work, such as:<\/p>\n\n\n\n These practices help create space between stimulus and response, allowing more intentional leadership.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You can find more information and resources about The Anatomy of Peace<\/em> on the Arbinger Institute<\/strong> website.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Leadership is often described as something we do to or for others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This episode is an invitation to see leadership as something that starts within:From behavior to being<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
The Anatomy of Peace<\/em> pushes this idea further:<\/p>\n\n\n\nA heart at peace or a heart at war<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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Boxes, judgment, and responsibility<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
stories we tell ourselves such as I deserve<\/em>, I\u2019m better than<\/em>, I need to be seen as<\/em>, or I\u2019m worse than<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n
Signals from the body and inner practices<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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Further resources<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
A final thought<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
with how we see others, how we relate, and who we choose to be in each interaction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/blog-alexis.monville.com\/en\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/2\/2020\/04\/Screenshot-from-2020-04-04-10-17-36.png?resize=375%2C283&ssl=1\")
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